Sex positivity: Catch fire & come alive
by Francesca Flansburg
On a typical day, we have so many obligations- getting to appointments, taking care of loved ones, tending to financial matters…the list goes on. It’s so easy to lose ourselves in the hum-drum routine of everyday life. But I suggest we pause together for a moment to remember our glorious sexuality! What does it mean to be sex-positive and how can we use it to bring some vibrant color back into our lives?
The sex-positive movement strives to shift societal attitudes from framing sex as something shameful, embarrassing, taboo, secret, or otherwise negative, to acknowledging sex as natural, healthy, and a vital part of the human experience, to be cultivated and revered. With an emphasis on personal preference and choice, safer sex practices, and informed consent, the sex-positive movement is non-judgmental, recognizing all consensual acts as having the potential to promote sexual health and pleasure. Whether exploring sexuality solo or with partners, we have the right to learn, experiment, play out fantasies, have fun, and find ways in which we heighten our sexual pleasure.
As women today, we have the power to actively explore the ways in which we can fulfill our deepest desires. We can embrace our wants and needs, learning how to communicate them unapologetically, if necessary (and it’s usually necessary). We can, and should, become knowledgeable about which bodily sensations we find especially pleasing and how to find more ways and more opportunities to make that happen.
This week, our Lounge members talked about what sex-positivity means to them:
“Sex positivity to me, means accepting my sexuality as it is. It’s a healthy, personal, and incredibly intimate part of my life that I choose to share with my partner. Sex positivity is sharing our experiences together, as crazy and unique as they may be, accepting each other’s desires wanting to please, and knowing only the two of us know the secret world that we share.”
“I love this topic!! Sex positive, to me, means being able to approach, view, or engage in sex as a consenting adult without the lens of it being dirty, laughable, unnatural, or improper.
I experienced a strange shift in the culture around me where in my teen years, I was bombarded with messaging to cover my body and keep away from boys. Sex was the worst thing in the world and thinking of it could get you pregnant! Then I married very young and was supposed to turn on a dime into someone who found sex to be a gift keeping my marriage fresh and intimate. As a wife later in marriage, the messaging around sex was that it was something that was for my husband. The trope is always about the wife with the headache, and there isn’t empathy or support for women who are navigating sexual needs or libidos that are higher than their partners...it was a process to unwrap all of that and shake free.”
For funsies, here’s a little quiz to get you thinking a little bit about your own sex-positive thoughts and attitudes.
Personally, I think everyone could benefit from stoking the fires of our sexuality, allowing it to flourish and come madly alive! Again, whether you are flying solo or sharing your intimate life with someone else, there is always room to expand and grow (Oooops! No pun intended). Therefore, here are a few resources and suggestions to set you on the path toward a richer and more vibrant sexual life.
SHOP:
Medusas of Rochester: If you are looking for a local boutique that offers a safe and inclusive space for all, visit Medusas of Rochester. Here, you can shop for lingerie, accessories, and personal care products in an environment that fosters sex-positivity while allowing patrons to feel comfortable asking questions. While at Medusas, you are sure to get personal attention (if you want it, that is) without feeling judged for any reason. With the comfort and ease of shopping at At Medusas of Rochester, you just might find something new…something YOU!
Lastly, explore your unique sexuality by setting up a boudoir or intimate photography session! What a great way to play with different scenes, outfits, props, styles, and poses in a safe environment where YOU are the central focus. Let our team help bring out and capture your sexiest, most authentic self in steamy, sensual images that highlight your unique beauty. Remember, none of the images you see here are those of professional models. These gorgeous queens are just like you! Expressing their sexy selves with the help of our photographers at BSNY.